Life Management Top Tips

My friends generally fall into two camps - the busiest people imaginable, or people with basically nothing to do.  I am in the nothing to do camp, and here's how:

• Hire a cleaning person who will also do your laundry and dishes. They should come every week. When I used to move apartments every year, my cleaning person also packed me up and unpacked me after the movers came, because they know where all of my stuff went and how I like things organized.

• Find a reliable handyman - you are not actually going to re-caulk your toilet or change the flapper valve.  If you haven't done it in a week, call your handyman and it will be done by the weekend. Keep  a list of all the things that bother you about your house and then have them come over for a full day and knock everything out. 

• Use a DMC (Direct Medical Care) provider.  You pay a monthly subscription and your doctors appointments are now basically same day.  You have 24 hour access to your doctor or the on call person and you actually get a reply ASAP. They remind you when you need tests and checkups. You want an MRI, X-ray, bloodwork, etc.? You can have one that week and pay a deeply discounted price compared to insurance. 

• Put all of your bills on autopay.  I check my transactions once a week but other than that, I don't have to worry about paying anything.

• Try to just own things you love.  You should be able to pull any item of clothing out of your closet and be willing to wear it today.  If it doesn't fit, isn't comfy, doesn't look right on you, it goes into storage or gets tossed/donated.  I also like having multiples of things.  I own 7 pairs of my favorite pants, 7 of my favorite shirts, 7 of my favorite pajamas, 5 colors of my favorite shoe, etc. 

• Everything goes on my calendar the INSTANT I know about it. If I sign up for a trial, the reminder to cancel is going on my calendar at once. If I get assigned a mystery shop, it goes in my calendar with a link to the location and which company it is for. Birthdays?  Already a recurring meeting on my calendar.  

• Look at your schedule months in advance. If you have a wedding in 2 months, do you know what you're wearing?  Is it dry cleaned?  Does it look good on you and are you comfortable in it? Keeping ahead of your events will prevent you from spending an entire weekend scrambling to find a dress and shoes. 

• Keep a stockpile.  I buy greeting cards in a giant variety pack so I don't need to go out and buy one the morning of a birthday party.  I keep a variety of nice candles, wine, and other gifts in case I need them. I also have backups of everything I use the most. Food, toiletries, household stuff - anytime I need to get the backup, it goes on a list so you never need to go out and get stuff last minute. It also helps save money.  

**Disclaimer: Probably important to mention that the main reason I don't have to do very much is because I make a very good salary, am very responsible with that money, and I generally do not have to worry about paying for things or hiring people to help me. I understand this is not everyone's situation.**

People are always saying how hard it is to make friends after college.  It's hard for them because they haven't tried to make a friend in forever.  Your life will change dramatically every few years, and so will the lives of your friends.  They will ebb and flow in terms of availability and personality. They will move away, they will have kids, etc.  You cannot expect the person you have hung out with every week for years to always be able to hang out every week forever.

The key is to REPLENISH.

I make a new friend when a friend tells me they:

• Are moving away

• Are engaged

• Are pregnant

You will absolutely still be friends with these people.  You will still get brunch and text and take trips.  Just not as often.  These are great life milestones for them and great for you too because now you can: visit them in their new city, become friends with their partner and partners friends, and hang out with cute little babies who grow up into mean tweens you can gossip with.  But you can't expect to see these friends as often as you did before.  I like to hang out with friends 3-5 times a week, so the answer is: Replenish!

I meet new friends at activities such as:

• Book Clubs

• Current Friends' Events

• Game Nights

• Cooking Classes

• Traveling

• Work (when I used to be in-office)

Not all of your new friendships will go the distance and that's ok.  The act of making new friends means that it will never again feel awkward to make new friends. And that's the whole point. 

When I added a gratitude journaling app to my daily checklist several years ago it seemed very dumb.  However, it has made one of the biggest differences in my day-to-day life.  Once you start writing down 3 things you are grateful for every day, you automatically start to notice great things happening to you and around you.  The cashier at Torchy's gives you a free drink, gratitude.  Its cloudy and breezy out, which is my favorite weather, gratitude.  I laughed super hard today, gratitude.  I came home to an ice cold house after being outside in the heat, gratitude.  My whole house smells like Fabuloso after my cleaning lady was here, gratitude.  

I use the Presently app. 

I have a list of things I try to do every day:

• Take any meds or vitamins

• Meditate for 10 minutes

• Put on sunscreen

• Write down 3 things I am grateful for

• Put away 10 things that are not where they are supposed to be

• Drink 100 ounces of water (I can usually get 50)

• Poop (this is actually one of the most important things because it reminds me to stay hydrated, eat vegetables, etc.)

• Work out for 45 minutes (I never do this but it's on the list as a reminder)

I keep a spreadsheet that contains my entire life.  It's about 20 tabs and the foundation of my organizational system.  

• Annual Bingo Card

• Subscription Tracker

• Grey Hair Tracker

• Period Tracker

• Free Stuff Calendar

• Electric Usage Log

• Packing Lists

• Car Maintenance Tracker

• Home Maintenance Tracker

• Medical Expense Log

• Inventory

• Prep Lists

• Credit Card Benefit Tracker

• Budget Scenarios - Austerity, Normal, Irresponsible

I find it very hard to turn off my phone at night.   That's why I have a Daytime Phone and a Nighttime Phone. 

Daytime Phone: Your regular phone, self explanatory.

Nighttime Phone: This phone is wifi-only, so no one can call or text you.  The only apps on this phone are the ones you are allowed to use at night  For me those are: 

• NYT Games: because I do the Sudoku and Crossword when they reset at 9pm

• Media Player: to play my bedtime yoga video I have downloaded

• Headspace: to play a meditation and sleep story

• Alarm

No TikTok, no Instagram, no internet browsers, no distractions.